I tried to make resolutions this year. Typically, I’m not much of a New Year’s resolutions person. I haven’t been since about thirteen-years-old when I realized that failure was the most commonly associated word with said resolutions. However, this year I attempted to give it a whirl because, you know, everyone is doing it or something.
Now, on January 3rd, I’m prepared to announce that I have no official resolutions, and I’m feeling pretty good about it. It just wasn’t a process that worked for me.
The truth is this–our resolutions (and whatever other labels we place on our goals) are about a desire to become the person we imagine we can be. It’s matching reality to our ideal. I would argue that often our ideals need some tweaking (perfection is not gonna happen, people), but other than that I’m really fascinated by the idea that we have visions of ourselves that we strive to become. This is my tendency…to be vague and dreamy and not at all concrete, but it’s the way my mind churns so you’ll have to deal with it.
So my giant, vague non-resolution is to grow into that person I imagine I can be (and sometimes already am), to make my reality look more like my dreams.
While that sounds as abstract as can be, it does whittle down to concrete decisions. How about doing something that will leave me with a sense of productivity rather than a brooding sense of wasted time? Maybe writing rather than watching television? Or taking a run instead of staring at facebook for half an hour? (Can you tell that I’ve been spending a lot of time being a lazy sack of bones?)
One specific thing I want to do is cultivate this blog into a space that makes me, and perhaps others, happy. I need the outlet, and I want the documentation of the passing time. I’ve been sporadic with blogging because I wasn’t sure what I wanted to focus on. I read these great food, health, and design blogs that have focus and purpose, which led me to strive for the same before even finding my footing in the whole blogging adventure. So I’m just going to write. I’m probably going to write about cooking and books and fashion and who-knows-what-all. I’m going to write, create, and document and be satisfied.